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Team Building Spanking

Its amazing to me, Dear Reader, the things retarded HR people expect one to do in the name of “Team Building”  I suppose Your Humble Narrator should not be surprised.  After all we are talking about a career that produces no product and requires no discernable skill set other than asking basic questions to a candidate to make sure he or she is higher functioning than a gnat. 

As you might have guessed that is indeed where your Humble Narrator has been for the past number of days.  During our semi-annual get together of meaningless corporate buzzwords and forced interaction with sycophants,  we  performed skits, drew pictures,  colored and put stickers on things.  While I might have a flair for exaggeration Dear Reader,  the sad fact is that I am dead serious. 

But my semi annual torture session is of course over.  So it is time to bring a little sunshine back in my life with the Spanking Updates of the Week!

You Dear Reader,  Spanking, being a rather unpleasant experience for the female getting spanked.  One must accept some “acting” to a degree.  I mean unfortunately you kinda have to stop when they tell you to do otherwise it becomes something called assault.  That being said.  If Bailey Paige is acting,  I cannot tell.  The tears and the pleas look and sound as real as they come, and of course porn starlets are not exactly known for their brilliant dialog.  From Dallas Spanks Hard.

You know Dear Reader,  I don’t have that much of fashion sense.  But considering Sarah Gregory is my Good Friend John Ozborne’s main squeeze.  I should probably tell him that anytime she decides to wear a camouflaged miniskirt she probably should be spanked.  From Spanked Callgirls or the better valued 5 site Clare Fonda Pass

So I was just watching a video of some entitled schoolgirl repeatedly telling her teacher to fuck off.  In the good old days that girl would be getting her ass hided by both the teacher and the parent when she got home.  But of course this is indeed not the good old days.  Instead it escalated to blows trying to remove the little shit from the classroom which will probably cost the teacher his job.  Thankfully we do not live in such a world and naughty girls such as this one get the paddle long before such a thing can happen.  From English Spankers.

You know Dear Reader,  I did my fair share of “hanging out” in my youth.  But I never quite got the whole concept of hanging out at a bus terminal.  Then again its probably just a valid hangout spot as the local convenience store but of course a spanking generally doesn’t come with it.  From Northern Spanking.


Slavery Spanking

We have a particular television show here in the states that traces celebrities "roots" that for some odd reason entertains a small segment of the population.  This weeks moronic scandal is that a couple of weeks ago they portrayed Ben Affleck and after they found out {gasp} that some distant relative of his owned slaves.  He successfully lobbied the program to omit that useless fact. 

Now I am not entirely sure what I am more aggravated about Dear Reader.  That A) I am writing about Ben Affleck in the first place.  B) We have become so PC that one feels the need to be embarrassed about some long lost relative doing bad things.  or C) it would even occur to someone to omit such a irrelevant fact in fear of reprisals. 

Let me tell you a little secret Dear Reader.  No matter what ethnicity, race or religion there is a 100% chance someone in your family tree owned slaves, raped, pillaged, killed lots of people or some other manner of bad shit.  The evidence of course is as simple as you're in fact alive and reading a spanking blog.

You see Dear Reader the one thing that is certain about your ancestors is that they were quite adapt at not becoming dead before they passed their gene's on.  due to the rather violent nature of the human over the centuries that would ensure that they much better at killing, raping, or slave owning than their victims. Hence the reason why you are indeed here today.  It is also why we enjoy spanking so much.  Someone had to get good in keeping those women in line, particularly during the Spanking Updates of the Week!

So lets start off with a New Spankee this week Dear Reader.  Meet 24 year old Courtney Shea.  At 5’7 and 134 pounds she might appear to be a little too big to put over your knee.  But indeed Dear Reader this is a real Georgia Peach.  And as we all know our  southern brethren are not squeamish baring a girls bottom and giving her a whooping.  So let us assume she is indeed used to it.  From My Spanking Roommate or the better valued 5 site Clare Fonda Pass

So I hate to brag, but my significant SO like this gentleman here is considerably younger than I am.  Perhaps not as young as Madison Young but close.  So I can sympathize with the poor tired man having his younger hotter partner beg for sex.  The thing these women just don’t understand,  is we are tired!  Even finding the Viagra is exhausting.  While we may not be able to perform every night,  Spanking isn’t nearly as exhausting.  From Shadowlane.

Chris Christie this week,  One of the few Republican’s I kind of like.  Decided that if he were president he would ignore the popular referendums legalizing pot in various states and start throwing people in jail,  possibly to eat them.  This is of course means that we will not have to worry about him becoming president since he just pissed off the entire west coast.  But since he is from Jersey we might give him a break since all that toxic waste has rotted his brain (and his thyroid).  Mandy Rae might also be from Jersey but she is way too young for her brain to be rotted yet.  Instead just poor decisions is why she is getting spanked.  From Punished Brats.

Filed under “Why the fuck didn’t I think of that” a new website opened up in London called “We Buy Any Porn”.  Apparently because you can’t make it anymore in the UK.  But all joking aside these guys will happily pay cash for your recently deceased grandfather’s porn stash.  No matter how bizzare it might be.  So I guess my kids can profit off my extensive spanking collection when I die.  I wonder how much watching Satine Spark getting spanked will be worth.  From Real Life Spanking

Finally for tonight, how nice it must be to arrive home only to find Riley already in her nightgown waiting for a good old fashion strapping before bed.  Hell it might even relax me more than Ambien.  From Real Spanking or the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass.


OTK Sleepover Spanking (Part 2)

Outlander Spanking

Sorry about my silence for the past week Dear Reader.  The truth is that I have been interviewing quite intensely back in my beloved city in a desperate attempt to vacate myself from the poor excuse that is my employer.  Intensive 3 hour interviews are quite exhausting along with all the thank you letters and what not.  Unfortunately it was all for not which of course brings me back to square one on the job search.  But Dear Reader, life goes on.  So lets take a look at all the stuff we missed last week. 

I have been hearing about this scene for a while.  Thanks Chross
Alex gets Caned
SJW Gets Spanked
Pandora’s Letter
Never seen this before
Glowing Results


Transsexual Spanking

So the FBI once again got in contact with Your Humble Narrator.  Like always I assumed it was once again to scold your humble narrator for his subversive political writing and promoting the idea that all women need to be spanked. 

But I was wrong Dear Reader as it turned out they were warning me.  It seems a bunch of pro-isis script kiddies are hacking wordpress sites. So If suddenly pictures of women's bare bottoms getting beaten are suddenly replaced with a bunch of guys shouting in Arabic cutting off someone's head.  Feel free to drop me a line. 

That being said let us start this weeks Spanking Updates of the Week. 

So I have been getting calls from solar companies now quite often.  I would really like them to perhaps look at a map before they call me since my home sits on a side of a mountain and living in the middle of a forest isn’t exactly conducive to capturing sunlight to turn into energy.  But one would think someplace like Florida,  would be a  virtual Saudi Arabia of Solar energy.  That is of course until you realize it is indeed Florida and sense has little to do with the way things work down there.  Apparently utilities really really don’t like the fact that the sun provides virtually free energy and they pay their politicians not to let people do it.  No wonder our friend Greg the Mystery spanker moved down there.  Because there are so many retarded people down there that at least a few hot ones need a spanking.  From Bun Beating Fun

Dear Reader, meet the newest naughty lady to grace the screen of Spanked Sweeties.  This is 23 year old Ivy Surewood who stands 5’2” tall and is 110 lbs sopping wet.  It seem that her parents believed in spanking among some other creative punishments as she was growing up.  Which is great since she is the perfect size to put over your knee and go to town on her hot little bubble butt.  Also Available though the better valued 5 site Clare Fonda Pass

I don’t think its any secret Dear Reader that I indeed hate selfies.  I simply do not understand why our females upon obtaining a cell phone have the overwhelming need to take pictures of oneself.  You look in the fucking mirror every day.  Do you not know what you look like?  So I think our friend David Pierson is onto something by having them spanked when ever the urge takes over.  From Punished Brat

So this is a first Dear Reader,  at least to me.  You know,  when I was looking to expand my spanking empire I thought.  Why are there no sites dedicated to spanking male to female transsexuals?  Yea I get the fact they have the wrong naughty bits but I will have to admit they do a amazing job at hiding it.  In addition if you are going to live as a woman I would argue you should get spanked as one.  Well Mr M,  always pushing the envelope must have wondered the same thing.  So Dear Reader,  meet Staci the first trans-op transsexual ever to get spanked (as far as I know) on a website.  To tell you the truth I would have never known if it wasn’t stated in the interview.  She did have an odd way of speaking but I honestly thought she was going to tell us she was in the military.  None the less I like Mr M’s attitude about the whole thing.  Some will like it,  some will not.  Fuck it,  lets get you spanked.  From Real Spanking or the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass.

Finally for tonight,  Lying around in ones skimpy clothing is usually not a good idea when you have pissed off ones boyfriend and he is intent on spanking you.  From Marked Butts


Disconnect Spankings

As you can tell From my irregular posts over the past few weeks.  I have been a bit discombobulated.  This mainly started last Friday when my computer absolutely refused to access The Spanking Spot.  I thought perhaps my server was down.  Happily everyone else could get to it.  Including myself if I used a proxy.  Its not being blocked from what I can tell,  it simply times out.  Strange indeed.  Well now that I have a work around I should be more consistent.  So the next order of business is of course the Spankings of the Week!

So the Walking Dead is indeed over.  What will Your Humble Narrator do on his Sunday nights!  But fear not Dear Reader The Game of Thrones is beginning in a week or two and once again we will be treated to intrigue, betrayal, incest and hopefully a little bit more spanking.  This also means that its time for crazy Masie Dee to get her bottom in shape even though that little shit Joffrie bit the dust last season.  Maybe someone will spank the other Maisie.  From Real Life Spanking

Perhaps I Spoke too Soon Dear Reader.  There will be likely no update on Thursday because once again Your Humble Narrator will jump on a train to his beloved city for yet another interview.  This is of course that Your Humble Narrator has decided even with a 1:45 schlepp on a train is better than having my intelligence insulted by 4th rate employee’s of a 2nd rate company.  As you know interviews leave one almost physically exhausted particularly 3 hour ones.  So I doubt I will feel much like writing.  But I shall try.  Particularly if Kami Robertson gets spanked again next week on Triple A Spanking

Tonight is of course both Good Friday and indeed Passover.  So I wish my religious friends a wonderful night of eating matzo soup or flagellating one self.  Or in this case getting spanked in a very embarrassing position.  From Real Spanking Institute or the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass

So I have been addicted as of late to GTA V online.  The only place where stealing, murder and general mayhem is rewarded.  They have just launched (after a year) heists which  are quite fun.  Particularly the bank heists which is incidentally the same crime that lovely newcomer Ella Hughes is incarcerated (and Spanked) For.  From Bars and Stripes

Finally for this week we shall finish up with Pandora Blake.  Because well….. She is Pandora Blake!  From Sarah Gregory Spanking


Surveillance Spanking

Recently Dear Reader the head of HR came waddling into my department which is generally a bad sign.  She was there to bring good news and to give each of us a present in the form of a Fitbit like thing. For those who may not know its a wristwatch thing that collects data about your body. 

It seems since our insurance premiums were so high,  The company was "encouraging" us to wear these devices to "track" our health.  As a reward of selling your privacy one would get "points" for doing healthy things which one could spend on something like an amazon gift card.  Your Humble Narrator being himself brought the device home and promptly attached it to the dog. 

Needless to say the powers that be were quite amazed that I could run around the dog park at 40 MPH (I have a greyhound) and spent an inordinate amount of time sniffing around fire hydrants.  We shall continue the rest of the story with the spanking updates of the week.

As my Friend Dallas knows I am not one for conspiracy theories.  But my refusal to wear such a thing is based somewhat in reality.  You see one of the things Your Humble Narrator excels at (unlike writing) is utilizing large amounts of information to predict what you are going to next so I can sell you shit.  Thus knowing what I know,  and knowing what can be done with it.  One can get a little paranoid.  I shall of course explain further but for now enjoy young Destiny getting her ass burned like she never has before.  From Dallas Spanks Hard

You see Dear Reader, though the miracles of modern technology, imbedded in that device is a heart rate monitor an accelerometer and a fancy pedometer all conveniently hooked up to your phone via bluetooth transmitting all that juicy information along with GPS positioning across the series of tubes we call the internet to a central repository.  While I am not a doctor,  I do know you can tell a great deal about someone by watching their heart rate coupled with the other things.  For example,  I know you are exercising and for how long.   I can tell if you are driving,  I can tell where you are driving.  I can even tell you with a reasonable amount of certainty based upon your location and heart rate when you are having sex.  Or in this case watching a hot young Kiki getting her ass beat on Real Spankings.  Or of course the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass

To make matters worse since we are in the infancy of wearable's,  its not exactly far fetched that these devices will soon monitor blood pressure, Blood sugar, even alcohol!  All of which is quite doable with present day tech.  Imagine for a second that your car will not start because your watch detects alcohol.  Or to be able to pinpoint the minute that you are hungry and offer you places to eat.  But of course if you don’t choose the healthy choice your health insurance goes up 10 bucks that month.  Hell I bet they could embed a device to ensure this next young girl to be spanked  with the odd name of Bemby is really over the age of 18.  Before I get an angry email from Spanking Sarah,  please know that due to Sarah’s reputation I am confident that the girl is of legal age (but damn she does look young or perhaps I am just old). 

Mind you Dear Reader this is in addition to all the other information that is happily being transmitted by your phone.  Download a silly app to do a face swap. Of course it wants access to your location, your contact list, your bookmarks, your Instagram and of course now your biometric information because apparently it needs all that to swap your friends face with a picture of a sore bottom you found online like on Punished Brats

The moral of this story Dear Reader is not to scold but to warn.  It is very possible I am being paranoid.  But knowing how to do the things that I do.  I find much of this quite likely.  Not in the far flung future but most in less than 5 years.  We Americans always thought Big Brother would come with a totalitarian regime with a Russian name.  But we never thought it would come in the form of us happily giving up our privacy to get the newest candy crush or to win a $5 Amazon card.  I have met Big Brother Dear Reader and his name is Brushstrokes and there are plenty of others like him. Just remember that when you click “Allow” on your phone that the guy who is getting that data moonlights as a Spanking Blogger.  From Firm Hand Spanking