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Strap-ons and Spanking

In an effort to help boost the economy, reduce long term unemployment, shrink government and reduce taxes the newly elected republican controlled congress logically began their legislative session by attempting to ban abortion and redefine rape.  This obviously is because well……  I can’t really think of anything.  On top of which any analogy I make will be less funny (or sad depending on how you look at it)  than the reality. 

Unfortunately this suggests we are facing the next 2 years much like the last two years, with congress getting absolutely nothing done because of the crazies in their party.  Fortunately we have the upcoming primary season to entertain us.  An of course the inevitable outrage when Hillary wins the Whitehouse.  In the meantime we of course can entertain ourselves with some good old fashion bare bottom spanking on the Spanking Updates of the Week!

So it appears our much celebrated cameraman is on a strap-on kick.  No less than two of the 5 sites available in the Clare Fonda Pass include the use of strap-ons as a way for the girls to “punish” each other.  I am not sure about you Dear Reader but the insertion of a large oddly colored facsimile of male genitals into various orifices generally doesn’t count as punishment the way a spanking does.   Then again most of it is indeed spanking and Jenna Sativa, Star Nine are pretty hot so who am I to judge.  From Girl Strap-on Girl.
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What Dear Reader could be worse than having a hit man after you. Well I can think of at least one thing worse.  If indeed he was into spanking you before he kills you.  From Dallas Spanks Hard.
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I have been away for far too long Dear Reader,  This “technically” isn’t an update for this week but it is indeed new to me.  And when can I resist sharing with you the one and only Amelia Jane Rutherford getting her bottom warmed in a tight little badminton uniform.  From Spanked in Uniform.
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Speaking of which Zoe Page is also keeping busy beating Amelia bare bottom.  In addition to smacking her perfect ass she also has some work to do with Alicia Fox’s bare bottom as well.  From Bars and Stripes
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Finally for this week our good friend Cake Boy had the opportunity to film the smoking hot Isobel Wren getting a nice otk spanking on her gorgeous rear.  From Triple A Spanking
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Brushstrokes

Global Warming Spanking

In a rare display of sanity, Dear Reader.  The United States Senate voted 98-1 that global warming was indeed real.  Thank you for clearing that up for us.  I would assume that their next vote is to confirm that the answer to 2+2 is indeed 4.  Unfortunately only 50 of them voted that it was in fact due to human activity.  Personally I blame snails.  After all they are the ones burning all the coal.  Perhaps we should have a war on snails.  Kill a snail,  save the planet! 

For their encore,  I think they will vote that women get spanked but not because they are naughty.  But despite what 100 morons have to say,  we indeed know the truth on the Spanking Updates of the Week!

To start today, I have a good source that tells me that the Able Amsterdam Authoritarian does in fact believe in global warming.  This of course Dear Reader, is unsurprising since his adopted country’s economy is predicated on lots of people sticking their fingers in leaky Dykes.  I also heard that he is overjoyed that 98 people of the United States Senate have confirmed this despite something like 80% of the population and almost every scientist that got their degree outside of a cracker jack box already knows.  So to celebrate this acknowledgement of reality he has brought back a very naughty girl that was dear to Yours truly when he first spanked her a number of years ago.  Dear Reader,  I present you with Mandy,  who oddly is about 100% more attractive now then when he bared her bottom the first time.  From Real Life Spanking
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The next vote they take in the senate will be the following.  Whether water is indeed wet,  If the earth is round and of course whether or not Jenna Jay should be spanked.  We are of course not waiting for the latter.  From Northern Spanking
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So for any of you that have Netflix,  I would encourage you to look up a British show called Black Mirror.  Now I realize our brit brothers and sisters are probably laughing at this since this series is over 2 years old and (I think) cancelled.  But it seems all the rage here.  The show imagines a dystopian future with regards to the technology that invades every aspect in our lives.  In addition it imagines the Prime Minister having carnal relations with a bovine on national television, which always makes for grand entertainment.  Unfortunately I have not come across any instances of spanking which one would imagine would fit right in.  None the less we will have to turn to the lovely Chelsea Pfeiffer paddling the soon to be red ass of Alex Reynolds.  From Good Spanking
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Before I left for my sabbatical I reported our own favorite cake boy was playing hid the salami with none other than Sarah Gregory.  But what he is realizing is having such a precocious girl friend is quite a bit of work.  Particularly during sleepovers.  Needless to say his right hand is somewhat useless now with all the spanking he has to do.  From Sarah Gregory Spanking
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Brushstrokes

State of the Spanking

Yesterday Dear Readers,  The President of the United States gave his annual State of the Union Address.  For those of you outside the good old United States,  This is an annual address required by the constitution where the president addresses congress to tell them that everything is hunky dory.  Last night our first Kenyan President did just that.  He talked about perhaps giving everyone who wants to go to college the opportunity to do so.  He spoke about how it might not be a good idea to pay people so little that they require welfare just to get by.  And he told us that having all the money in the hands of a couple of very rich people is probably a really really bad idea. 

But with all the State of the Unions since we only have 2 equally corrupt parties in this country the opposite side wanted a rebuttal.  Where we were greeted by a maniacal smiling Joni Ernst who spoke about bread shoes and how giving people healthcare was somehow bad.  What was missing of course from both sides was any mention of bringing back the right to spank women.  Which is what we are here today to celebrate on The Spanking Updates of the Week!

We begin today with a brand new teacher at Real Spanking Institute.  Ms. Cross as with all new teachers needs to put some limits on her students.  Limits Dear Reader that the girls ultimately test.  In this case the unlucky trail blazer is none other than Lila Night.  Even worse for lovely Lila is that this woman can SPANK!  Also available though the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass.
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It is a generally accepted fact here in America that African American parents are far more likely to use corporal punishment on their young-ins than the rest of us.  Statistically speaking then it is likely that young Cupcake here has felt the burn of her bottom at least a number of times growing up.  I don’t think she remembers it hurting like this.  From Spanked Sweeties or the better valued 5 site Clare Fonda Pass
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It looks like while I was on my leave of absence on The Spanking Spot,  Our friend David Pierson has been hard at work recruiting more talent to ummm…..  Get spanked!  Dear Reader, Meet Candence who got her first spanking a number of weeks ago.  Not only does she look adorable in a schoolgirl outfit she can take a pretty good spanking and her expressions are priceless.  Not to mention she might have enjoyed it (watch the movie and watch the rear view).  From Punished Brats
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While us American’s obsession with football mystifies the world just as their obsession with girly-men kicking a soccer ball does us.  The big news is that unsurprising to no one.  The evil patriots cheated! This of course wouldn’t matter if the Giants were in the Superbowl to once again defeat Tom Brady but sadly this is not the case.  We will have to depend on the Seahawks and the NFL to get Bill Belecheck to play football and….  you know…..  not cheat.  Personally I would like to see the Patriots disqualified and the win go to the Colts.  In addition any attractive close female relative of his spanked.  From Real Life Spanking
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I will have to admit, Dear Reader,  after panning some of Firm Hand Spanking’s spanking a couple of months ago.  I will have to say that they have upped their game with their new models.  This is the very cute Portia Marlowe who takes a pretty hard and painful spanking. 
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Brushstrokes

Bonnie and Clyde Spanking

I have been watching the news with amusement over the weekend.  You might have heard this already Dear Reader but two teen love birds from Kentucky embarked on a multi-state crime spree.  The reported spark that caused this is that Dalton Hayes is 18 and his girlfriend Cheyenne Phillips is unfortunately only 13.  While it might be obvious to us,  seemingly the couples parents are mystified why they might have taken off (It is Kentucky after all). 

To make things even more amusing,  Cheyenne’s own parents characterized her as a compulsive liar and more than likely told an untruth about her age.  When reportedly the hapless young fellow found out about her age,  he was "he was already done in love with her”  according to his mother. 

Well they are now caught (in Florida in all places) and sadly have a number of felonies back in Kentucky.  While he is facing jail time, this being Kentucky and her young age Cheyenne is inevitably facing a very hard and painful spanking. 

Now let us take a look at what the rest of the spanking Blogosphere is talking about,. 

 

Chross
Wonderous
Can’t Sit Down Sunday
Cowgirls
Spanking Writers go Dark
I got a thing for Fae Corbin
Pictures

Pornstar Bailey Paige gets the Paddle on the Bare Bottom

If any of my faithful readers happen to know Mitt Romney,  I would appreciate asking him to call Yours Truly because we really need to talk.  You see Dear Reader,  I get that he thinks he deserves to be president.  I get that being beaten by a commoner hurts. We understand that you think 47% of us are freeloaders and have no right to pick our leaders. 
At this point Mittster we really have to be honest with you,  you are getting even creepier than your magic underwear.  While we know the whole concept of being fair is foreign to you and the rest of the 1%.  Its really time to give someone else a turn. 

Not mind you Dear Reader, I am looking forward to Jeb.  But my guess Dear Reader when the real republicans start choosing someone and realize he isn't an advocate of summary execution of anyone who might be illegal somehow I think they will go with someone else much crazier. 

Now that I have said my piece Dear Reader, Let us finish up the Spanking Updates of the Week!

If Bailey Paige wasn’t a pornstar, she would be a perfect spankee.  Actually let me rephrase that.  Since Bailey Paige is a pornstar she makes a perfect spankee!  At 5’ 1”  (imperial measurements bitches!),  perhaps 90 pounds soaking wet and always doing something naughty she is the perfect specimen to put over your knee.  Something my Dear Friend Dallas does with zeal.  Next time I would suggest you perch her precariously over one knee and go to town on her incredible ass.  From Dallas Spanks Hard.
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This naughty young thing might look familiar to you. That is because you might have seen her before.  Dear Reader,  remember the spanking days gone past.  This is the one and only Rachel still looking radiant after all these years and in need of a spanking which the lovely Betty takes care of with a wooden paddle.  From Real Spanking or the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass.
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It looks like some changes are occurring with our spanking friends in the UK.  As I reported before,  in addition to trying to ban encryption so her majesty's secret service can watch you look at naughty pictures.  They have also banned the national kink.  Spanking of all things.  This of course can be problematic for our spanking houses over there.  Thankfully our Able Amsterdam Authoritarian has come to the rescue and running Bars and Stripes from…. well….. Amsterdam.  The format has also changed,  (for the better in my humble opinion). 
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Aaaaannnnddd since my Credit card just got cut off (to protect me from buying spanking porn).  I need to wait until it resets.  So I will leave you this week Dear Reader with Belinda Lawson in her birthday suit getting a hard and painful spanking that she obviously deserves.  From Firm Hand Spanking
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Brushstrokes

No Smoking Spanking

So during my hiatus Dear Reader, I managed once again to quit smoking.  Well sort of anyway.  Now I know they have been around for a bit,  but I finally tried e-cigarettes.  Before I go on,  let me state that they are a pathetic simulacrum for the sweet sweet pull of acrid burning tobacco.  But trade that off by still getting your nicotine fix thus avoiding any murders,  And considerably lowing your risk of getting cancer.  I would say its well worth it.  Besides one can vape anywhere!

Well that is until the rabid anti-smokers get their way.  You see although most doctors that have done studies of "vaping" have grudgingly admitted it is probably far less harmful than analog cigarettes.  Our nitwit ninnies have decided that vaping "looks" like smoking and thus it should be banned.  How does one logically try to ban something that helps people quit the very thing the people are against because it vaguely reminds them of the very thing. 

That is indeed like trying to ban spanking because it reminds them of domestic violence.  Oh yes…. they have already tried.  But not on the Spanking Updates of the week!

Because I seem to be contributing to the global overpopulation crisis I often get asked my thoughts on a couple’s decision to have multiple short people.  I usually tell them not to, since the difficulty in parenting compounds with the ways short people can fight.  Now when you have older lovely girls any more than two means that you will have to get up and chase one eventually since you and your SO will be busy spanking the other two.  From Northern Spanking.
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This one is a bit old Dear Reader,  I think it was filmed at Shadowlane back in September.  But Its got the lovely Chelsea Pfeiffer giving Amelia Jane Rutherford a taste of a good old American spanking.  To enhance Amelia's taste of all things American I heard after the shoot they went to a gun range and shot automatic weapons at cartoons of Mohammad hitting Jesus with a Koran.  From Good Spanking
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Jeez I have been away way too long.  You know Dear Reader I am a Sucker for redheads.  Spanking Sarah Gregory found one!  Dear Reader meet Melody Nore,  who you might be surprised to find out has been in the spanking scene for 3 years.  As for the lovely vixen spanking her,  that is Angel Lee,  daughter of spanker Tasha Lee!  I am not entirely sure how I feel about that.  But hey,  Who am I to judge. 
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Now one of the things that made me quit Dear Reader, was a number of Spanking Houses taking exception to my frank and candid description of their spanking.  One of which was Firm Hand Spanking, when I called them out on their rather fake and paddy cake spanking.  Now before you go off and hurl abuse.  I will say we had a civil discourse and honestly disagreed with each other.  There was no harm done.  One of the things I have tried to do is keep up with the spanking world in my absence.  One of the subscriptions I had a 6 month sub on before I quit was Firm Hand.  I will say,  after that one little disappointing group of spankings. They have come back (with an exception or two) with a vengeance.  One of the surprises is that they had Monica Bouget back to do a scene with none other than Allison Miller.  Now the first time I saw her,  I thought she was a perfect Spankee.  Small, hot and with a fantastic butt.  But,  the spanking leaved something to be desired.  But in this one,  This girl gets her gorgeous butt burned in a very painful matter. 
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Brushstrokes

Madyson Knight Gets a Bare Bottom Spanking

The one thing I have learned during my 6 month hiatus is that as much as things change Dear Reader.,  they stay the same.  Sure,  we have a different group in the middle east cutting peoples heads off now and our friends across the pond somehow managed to make filming our hobby illegal.  But of course,  the rich are richer,  the poor are poorer and we are contemplating electing yet another Bush to fuck up the world.  Will we ever learn?

Apparently we are all exactly like our girls who forget spanking is a very real possibility like now on the Spanking Updates of the Week!

So I was a little worried when I heard Colorado was brave enough to stop the ludicrous practice of incarcerating people because they like to smoke a week.  I was concerned Mr M would as our drug warriors warned us, would become a drug addled lunatic that ate Cheeto’s all day rather than spank pretty girls.  Of course such fears were unfounded since Colorado saved $140 Million by not chasing stoners with the munchies and generated another $60 million in taxes,  Of course just because its legal now doesn’t men that you can’t spank schoolgirls who use it.  From Real Spanking Institute or the better valued 5 site Real Spanking Pass
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So Greg and his friend the other Mystery spanker were not idle.  Skipping the bowls of NJ they have relocated their filming site to Pennsylvania.  Unlike New Jersey,  PA does not smell nor is it strewn with garbage.  But it has little else going for it since most the state between Philly and Pittsburg is one vast wasteland of gun racks,  pickup trucks and the occasional Amish.  But Despite this unfortunate fact there are still plenty of naughty girls there that need a spanking.  Today that comes in the form of one very pretty Madyson Knight.  From Bun Beating Fun.
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So as I alluded to Great Britain managed to ban filming their national kink.  Yes they banned spanking between consensual adults.  They also banned face sitting which is er… umm… strange.  In addition they banned physical and verbal abuse,  which the Germans already have covered and the British are too polite for that anyway.  After all “Jolly Ho,  You Dirty Cum Slut,  Would you Like to Come For Tea” just doesn’t sound right.  In any case that puts many disciplinarians in the UK at a bit of a disadvantage since they can’t spank anyone anymore.  Thankfully Our Able Amsterdam Authoritarian took pity on our lovely Zoe Paige and brought her over to his neck of the woods where he can safely ignore such a silly law.  Perhaps there she will get her first spanking.  From Real Life Spanking
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Now I might have mentioned that I had annoyed some spanking houses over the years and that lead me to take some time off.  After all it is no fun to blog about spanking when people are mad at you.  But again that has never stopped me from stating my mind.  Despite this,  I must say I am a little irked at our favorite cameraman.  You see while I was on my 6 month vacation he disabled my affiliate ID.  Now he might have done this for some valid reason that I cannot fathom.  But I find it somewhat disheartening he didn’t at least tell me first.  I even had to sign up for another one!, But I would appreciate my old one back.  Meanwhile here is the lovely (and very naughty) Bailey Paige getting a spanking on Spanked Call Girls or the better valued 5 site Clare Fonda Pass
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In Closing Dear Reader,  I shall return all the websites I usually write about.  But it might take a week or two.  You See the bank keeps cancelling my Credit Card after I sign up for one site or another.  So it might take a little while. 

Brushstrokes