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Thank you Dear Reader for putting up with my silence when I would normally be bringing you the spanking you both want and deserve.  Unfortunately in my bid not to get a real job and indeed not become homeless my other business venture has been taking much of my time.  I do hope I shall get back to my regular programming soon.  Meanwhile as Your Humble Narrator pulls out his hair trying to figure out the fundamentals of asp.net it seems that there is a new spanking site on the block. 

From what I understand The Big C who is of course the new caretaker of Clare Fonda’s spanking empire has discontinued Clare Spanks Men since she is indeed not around to spank them anymore.  Instead he has launched yet a new spanking site that may indeed be relevant to your interests. 

Named Spanking Sorority Girls it of course revolves around girls in sororities getting spanked,  which of course is a good thing since college girls can indeed get quite out of hand. 

While you are welcome to join,  I have not indeed reviewed this site and put my personal stamp of approval so my usual Spanking Spot Guarantee does indeed not apply until I have a chance to.  But knowing the reputation and indeed the samples I was sent I think indeed this is a non issue.  So while you patiently wait for The Spanking Updates of the Week that starts tomorrow I will leave you with a sample of what this new site has to offer. 

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Phoenix Askani Gets Her First Spanking and Where the Hell is Békéscsaba

Well Dear Reader they went off and did it.  The marvels of modern technology are at work.  A possible panacea for spankers and a horror to spankee’s everywhere.  What indeed have they developed?  The ultimate spanking tool?  No!  Our wonderful scientists have developed a robotic bottom that relates realistically to of all things…  A spanking!

Now while our girls should indeed be concerned I would have to say the technology has indeed not been refined enough to replace them yet.  After all spanking a disembodied ass is somewhat disturbing when compared to a pretty girl thrashing with all her might over your knee.  But indeed I think within many of our lifetimes we shall see a realistic Bratbot-1000.  A robot that is designed solely for getting spanked!  Then indeed what will our naughty ladies do!

Since we will all be spanking our Bratbot-1000 , without men to correct them I predict chaos and mayhem from our naughty girls desperate to get our attention!  Each one upping each other in futile attempts to get the spanking they deserve

Yes Dear Reader I have glimpsed the future and it is bleak.  The end of the world will come not with a flash and a nuclear winter,  or even throngs of floating Christians being raptured the hell out of here.  But it will be from marauding un-spanked women.

Thankfully we have some time Dear Reader.  So let us turn our attention to our embodied women who need a spanking on the Spanking Updates of the Week!

Happily I can report the new caretaker of Clare Fonda’s former spanking empire.  The guy with the best job in the world.  The Big C,  continues her tradition of attempting to spank every mainstream adult actress out there.  Dear Reader meet Phoenix Askani a beautiful redhead who (once I get my shit together) will undoubtedly appear on Spanked and Fucked. But for the meantime she finds herself over the Big C’s knee in a short denim skirt which makes it all the easier to bare her ass.  From Spanked Sweeties or the better valued 4 site Clare Fonda Pass.
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I am indeed happy to report that my sad male bluebird that has been singing his heart out has finally found a mate and is busily watching his new found female build her new nest.  Of course his tweets of joy are occasionally drowned out by the gleeful shouts echoing though the mountains of our mystery spanker’s battle call “BAAAAAAA GIRL”.  Once again he is called to deal with a self absorbed model who indeed refuses to work for the agreed upon fee.  But soon to be sore Summer has pulled this kind of thing on our long suffering friend.  Apparently the spanking he gave her the last time did not indeed leave a lasting impression.  Hopefully this time it will.  From Bun Beating Fun.
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Dallas this week continues his imaginative use of food storage products on the unfortunate (and adorable) Samantha Woodley with a whopping 31 minute update.  I would have to say I could never allow myself to do this to her.  Not that I disapprove Dear Reader.  But I fear that I would simply never allow her to leave!  From Dallas Spanks Hard.
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Good news for anyone slightly brown in the city of Phoenix AZ.  Someone finally has gotten fed up with the lunatic Sherriff Joe Arpaio and finally started suing him for violation of civil rights.  Not that I have anything against enforcing the immigration law or indeed making his prisoners wear pink underwear and live outside in the desert.  But indeed Sherriff Joe seems to think anyone without a sunburn does not deserve the protections of the constitution.  Perhaps the only civil right he has not broken is not instituting regular spankings for his inmates of his famed jail.  That honor is of course reserved for the inmates of the  all women’s prison at Bars and Stripes.
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On Sarah Gregory Spanking this week the Kyle Johnson finishes up her punishment with a stinging bare bottom spanking for of all things slapping a beer out of his hand.  Now while it was indeed a Bud Light (hence monkey piss) and probably should have been taken away from him since no human being should be subject to such horrors.  The least Sarah could of done is replace it with a proper beer.
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Now that spring is in full swing,  it is indeed good to get out in the great outdoors Dear Reader.  Unfortunately sometimes it is quite difficult to guarantee that a girl does not misbehave.  Thus it is always a good idea to bring along something to persuade them.  Since pulling down their pants is usually frowned upon in public a perfect implement is the good old strap,  compact and effective both on the jeans and the bare butt.  From Real spanking or the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass
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I suppose there is no shortage of girls in Hungary willing to take the cane for a chance to star in a major film and of course get paid.  On Mood Castings this week we have the very cute Sophie from Békéscsaba.  Which having no idea where or how to pronounce it I cannot make a smart ass comment about it.  Her bottom however is very very nice.  At least until it is beaten badly with the cane.
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Finally for today Dear Reader I leave you with the famed Dr Pfeiffer showing the hot little Sinn Sage the old adage.  A Spanking a Day will keep the Doctor away.  From Spank Sinn
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Brushstrokes

Schoolgirls and Maids Spanked Oh My

The President of the United states for the first time in history came out for Gay Marriage this week, infuriating our Christian crazies since allowing two people the legal rights of marriage somehow impinges on their right to hate them.  This of course is in response to the good people of North Carolina insisting that while it is perfectly ok to bugger your first cousin somehow it is bad if two unrelated people of the same sex bugger each other.

But I am indeed disappointed Dear Reader!  Since once again our politicians have decided to put their nose in our bedrooms I am indeed outraged he had nothing to say about spanking our ladies!  After all something as important as that indeed should be addressed by our president.  Is he indeed for or against wife spanking and if so,  on the bare bottom or other means.  Inquiring minds want to know Dear Reader. 

Well Dear Reader,  You of course know my stance on both gay marriage (there are way too many important things to think about) and indeed spanking (all for it).  Which of course is why I now bring you the next installment of the Spanking Updates of the Week!

We begin today with in my humble opinion are two of the most adorable newcomers in our little spanking hobby.  Both appearing together for the first time under our Able Amsterdam Authoritarian's hard hand.  Our little schoolgirls Scarlett and Cory who are simply delightful in their school uniforms find themselves over his knee with their captivating bottoms exposed while they vocally express their dismay and humiliation of getting a good hard spanking.  From Spanked In Uniform.
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You know Dear Reader I simply don’t understand people who spend a significant time thinking about what other people do in the bedroom.  There is simply way to much more important things to worry about.  Like indeed which cute schoolgirl is stealing cookies from the cupboard!  Fortunately it is the lovely long legged Lottie Kinsade who indeed earns herself a spanking in the most spanked in room of the house.  From Northern Spanking
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It seems Dear Reader that one spanking was indeed not enough to persuade the adorable Mia Mara to behave since she is back visiting our own Chelsea Pfeiffer once again.  Of course that short little dress she is wearing plus the lack of proper panties makes spanking her all that easier on the overworked Chelsea on Good Spanking
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Lets face it Dear Reader there is only a limited number of positions one can spank our ladies.  Some are more effective than others.  Thus our hard working spanking houses are indeed limited in their creativity.  Of course one playful spanking position is the inverted reverse cowgirl and while not the best position to dish a out serious spanking.  It does give one, one hell of a view.  From Triple A Spanking
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Mitt Magic Underwear Romney felt the need today to respond to a Washington post about his high school antics which unsurprisingly suggested that he was a rich, good looking, popular dick!  Who knew!  Now given no one should be judged on the stupid crap they do in high school but when you indeed spend your life callously throwing people out of work and bragging about it.  Well perhaps Mitbot has not upgraded his programming.  Of course the proper way to deal with bullying is dishing out a good hard spanking like Alex Reynolds is getting with a fearsome wooden hairbrush.  From Girl Spanks Girl or the better valued 4 site Clare Fonda Pass
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As if the lovely Pandora Blake doesn’t get spanked enough at home she goes and visit’s Spanking Sarah to learn how to become a maid.  Which of course being a talented spankee and web designer isn’t really her forte.  But it is of course a great excuse to give her a spanking. 
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Finally for today we have yet another maid themed spanking from our friends at Cutie Spankee.  A young girl goes to make her fame and fortune in Tokyo and gets herself a job as a domestic servant.  Unfortunately for her the lady of the house shows her exactly how her mistakes will be handled. 
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Brushstrokes

A Sailor Moon Spanking and Amelia Jane Rutherford Gets Bent over the Desk

So Your Humble Narrator took a trip into his beloved city recently to the hallowed ground of the freedom tower and the 9/11 memorial.  Not of course to see the recent hole in the ground that took 11 years to get filled but for a business meeting that overlooked the memorial of that terrible day,  which of course reminded me that I indeed hate memorials.

Its not memorials per se that I detest.  There are indeed events that should be remembered such as 9/11, D-day or even Pearl Harbor.  But it seems that everyone it seems that today, that quite a few people wants everyone to remember their loved ones doing incredibly stupid shit.  There is no further example of this than roadside memorials.

Now I indeed live off of a long and windy country road that usually claims at least one moron per year.  Not that I have a problem with people driving fast since I do indeed myself.  But I would rather not be reminded of others lack of the ability to drive with little white crosses and flowers.  Of course some of these are at obvious places,  a hairpin turn,  a blind corner or even a crossroad.  But the ones that drive your Humble Narrator crazy are the ones on straight sections that leave you wondering how in the world did this idiot manage to kill himself here?

Its not indeed because I don’t wish for families to remember their loved ones with poor driving skills.  I do however wish that they would stop reminding the rest of us.  Its not like we build a memorial to ever time a girl gets spanked.  If that was the case,  Shadowlane’s offices would be built of solid gold and people would make their yearly pilgrimage to Dallas’s home on their knees.

I assert that half of these roadside memorials could have easily been avoided had the female (Because of course its always the female’s fault) causing the accident been spanked quite harshly.  Which brings me to the first entry of the Spanking Updates of the Week!

We begin today with a lovely female of our own.  The too cute to spank Kat St James.  Now it is unknown whether or not she indeed can drive but indeed if she cannot she is always welcome to plow her car into mine any day.  As long of course she is willing to accept a bare bottom spanking from me like she is getting from her friend Stevie.  From Spanked Callgirls or the better valued 4 site Clare Fonda Pass.
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As many a soldier realizes when they go bravely to serve their country there are indeed some “liberties” that one gives up.  Now unfortunately in the UK they don’t have the reverence for free speech as their citizens can indeed be fined or even jailed for saying distasteful things.  In addition in the military they can indeed also be spanked.  Which of course is good for us since the offender is none other than Amelia Jane Rutherford who’s blog seems to be offending the military establishment.  From Firm Hand Spanking.
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Being down in my beloved city once again so close to the new freedom tower it also reminded Your Humble Narrator how much he indeed could not stand tourists.  Now far be it from me to deny others entry to my city to experience the sights and sounds.  But indeed one must consider that the rest of us actually need to get someplace.  Yes I do appreciate the fact you are marveling at the skyscrapers and other pretty buildings but don’t indeed do it blocking the sidewalk.  In fact anyone who does should be immediately spanked.  Which knowing the citizens of my beloved city most would not even noticed since we have seen stranger things.  From Punished Brats
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The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy describes the Towel the most useful thing any spacefarer could have.  Apparently young Corey disagrees as she has a habit of simply throwing it on the floor after she is done with it.  Fortunately our Able Amsterdam Authoritarian’s has the wisdom to recognize the humble towel for what it is.  And while she is made to pick it up she is given some hard and painful swats on her lovely bare ass.  From Real Life Spanking
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Mr M has yet a new naughty girl enrolling in Real Spanking Institute.  Dear Reader meet the rather bubbly 20 year old Roxy.  She is indeed just exploring her submissive side and indeed who better to come to than Mr M and his correctional school.  Obviously there are some good hard spankings to be dished out.  Like this one.  Also Available though the better valued 8 site Real Spanking Pass.
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Well as we saw last week the hot little Kiki got though her handspanking audition even after removing her tight short shorts.  But indeed sometimes something a bit more painful needs to be used.  While the strap and the cane are fearsome in their own right.  Having her bottom stinging already simply adds to the discomfort of a spanking.  From English Spankers
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Finally for today my dear friends at Handspanking debut their new girl.  The china doll like Ruri in addition to having a fantastic bottom to be spanked gets hers over the knee in a cute little sailor suit in school.
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Brushstrokes

Where or Where has Brushstrokes Gone

Yes Dear Reader reports of my demise have been highly exaggerated.  What indeed has kept me from my adoring fans?  Well Dear Reader,  it seems that my plans to become a full time webmaster has been thwarted by our masters at Google who for every intent and purpose seems dedicated to enforcing their vision of the world wide web on everyone which leaves little room for any website that doesn’t start with Amazon.com or some other well known brand who gives them lots of money.  So much for do no evil! 

Of course this is indeed in addition to scanning your home networks, violating your privacy and indeed helping themselves to anything you store on their nifty services like their “Google drive”.  But hey,  profits are profits. 

Eventually Dear Reader this behavior will result in them getting a good hard spanking and broken up, but I do not expect to see this anytime soon.  Thus I am indeed forced to focus on other business ventures which indeed demand my time rather than bringing you the spanking you both want and deserve and hopefully avoiding my future residence in a cardboard box. 

But this of course will not last forever for with any startup the work at the beginning is quite brutal.  Eventually once we get our investors I can go back to what is indeed important.  Girls getting good hard spankings. 

So I will leave you with some Galleries today and I indeed promise I will be back Thurs with the Spanking Updates of the week.  Oh and use Bing,  strangely their search is much better these days. 

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Brushstrokes

Sierra Salem’s Lost Spanking Tape

The Conservative Dutch Government who recently just got kicked out of office on news that people tend not to like to live in poverty so they can give money to rich people has managed to annoy the good people of Holland one last time.  Before their ousting the conservatives have managed to pass a law barring any non-hollish citizen from their famed coffee houses because of all thing, they are indeed concerned about people coming to their wonderful country to smoke pot.

What indeed a surprise Dear Reader,  people going someplace where something otherwise illegal is legal to partake in it.  Its like saying don’t go to Vegas because you might gamble!

You know Dear Reader I just don’t understand our conservative crazies obsession with a plant.  After all the bible calls for 8 pounds of the stuff in Exodus,  and you would figure anything that keeps us complacent and consuming would indeed be looked upon favorably.  After all if you legalize it Frito Lay would soon after become the largest company in the world!  No one has ever died from a THC overdose although you could indeed argue that after smoking it for some time it does tend to make one stupid.  Much like being a conservative.

Well enough of my ranting Dear Reader it is indeed time to continue the Spanking Updates of the Week!

Now of course our Able Amsterdam Authoritarian along with his fellow citizens are outraged at such a silly law.  They of course are challenging it in court.  Not that he indeed partakes but rather it simply gives him yet another reason to put naughty girls over his knee.  Won’t anyone think of the spankers!  Of course he has no shortage of reasons to spank our favorite little Kami Robertson particularly looking so adorable in her pretty pink airline outfit.  From Spanked in Uniform
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Of course two of the powerful groups that indeed want to keep the MJ illegal is of course the police and the private prison system.  After all what indeed will all these officers do when keeping us safe from stuffing our face full of Cheetos is made legal.  As for our prison for profit, well felons are good for business.  In fact we should make more innocuous things punishable by locking people up so our corporations can make more money!  I might of course advocate that if one of my inmates was the ravishing redhead Ireylnn Logeen and indeed she was locked in a small box just waiting for me to spank her.  From Bars and Stripes
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Due to some unforeseen circumstances Dear Reader this will be the last spanking update of the week.  So I will indeed try to get everyone I can in on this update.  But what,  what would keep Your Humble Narrator from his audience.  Well Dear Reader my quest for a new furry friend has come to fruition.  My new greyhound is on a truck as we speak leaving a life running around in a circle for the entertainment of old people to new adventures of becoming a house pet.  My friend Dallas has decided to delight me this week in celebration by digging out a never before seen long lost punishment spanking that he gave lovely Sierra Salem after she lost her job.  This indeed is a long and painful one and shows our friend as we have never seen him before with Sierra begging her then significant other to go light on the hard wooden bath brush that she would obviously rather be scrubbing her back then smacking her now red and bruised ass.  From Dallas Spanks Hard
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I guess for a professional spanking model birthdays are a somewhat painful affair and one to be avoided.  Which exactly is what Madison Martin tries to do until she is found hiding in her bosses office.  Of course its not a birthday without a proper birthday spanking.  Which Sinn Sage and the Big C obliges her.  From My Spanking Roommate or the better valued 4 site Clare Fonda Pass.
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Valerie Bryant aka Sabrina Scott gets a taste of what the wooden paddle feels like on her rather tight and pretty bottom.  Somehow from the tears that flow I doubt it is agreeable to her.  But then again when was a painful spanking ever agreeable to a lovely lady.  From Firm Hand Spanking
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While truth or day is a seeming innocuous game but as we all know when there is alcohol involved our girls can indeed get out of hand.  Particularly when Sarah Gregory is dared to slap a drink out of Kyle Johnson’s hand.  You would think she would already know what that would earn her.  Though she looks rather surprised when she is turned over his knee for a good hard spanking.  From Sarah Gregory Spanking
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It seems this week on Triple A Spanking Jenna Jay and Taylor Richardson have been caught in some naughtiness from the cruel House Mistress.  Unfortunately for them she has a brand new wooden paddle to try out on their bare bottoms.
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Finally for this week our Portly Punisher chastises a young teacher for of all things spanking a student.  Of course this privilege should belong to the headmaster.  Thus he gives her a taste of her own medicine on Sound Punishments.
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Brushstrokes

Amelia Jane Rutherford’s Intense OTK Spanking

Bill Nye,  of course being the science guy is about as innocuous figure there is and indeed probably the last person that should be appearing on a spanking blog.  But then again this is no average spanking blog!  The harmless host of the PBS educational series was apparently booed in Texas this week for of all things talking about science!  Now given this is indeed Texas, stronghold of our uninformed conservative crazies this of course is unsurprising.  However what he was admonished for brings the level of stupidity lone star state to new levels.

Did Mr Nye offend the audience speaking about the evil plot of us evolutionists to indoctrinate the innocent Christian children with the devil?  Did he suggest global warming was real?  No!  His sin was far worse.  He insisted that the moon did not of course emit its own light but rather that it was reflected by that thing called the sun!

Now you would think this would be common sense since we have actually landed on the thing and our brave astronauts did not indeed come back crispy nor glowing.  But that seems not enough evidence to the folks in Texas.  Mr Nye was booed and a number of people got up and left with one woman with 3 children shouting “We believe in the bible!” since Genesis apparently contradicts this evil theory  with the statement "God made two great lights — the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars."

And they wonder why we northern elites make fun of them.  Off to the spanking updates of the week!

We start today with not one of those pesky theories but a fact.  That our ladies indeed need to be spanked.  Illustrated today so perfectly by Amelia Jane Rutherford and Steven Lewis in a rather intense scene.  Amelia upon breaking a rule is indeed accepting of her fate.  No arguing and no outrage she submits herself in tears for her transgression.  Despite her obvious remorse that does not excuse the fact she is in for one hard bare bottom spanking.  From Northern Spanking
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What indeed is this Dear Reader!.  Our Able Amsterdam Authoritarian has yet a new girl in need of some correction! Dear Reader meet the very adorable 20 year old Scarlett.  Now this pretty young thing is out on her own for the first time without her parents gentle guidance and it seems that she has become something of a wild child.  Of course Triple A can help with this, but indeed not so gentle or painless.  Since she has never ever had a spanking before she shall see how effective it is.  From Real Life Spanking
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Ah it seems the tight body Kiki in her signature daisy dukes is back on English Spankers this week.  Finding herself over Auntie Katie’s knee she knows she is in for a long and painful spanking.  Of course the lovely color her bottom turns after her punishment says it all.
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I usually don’t indeed do this Dear Reader but I found Piper Hill so endearing I figured I would share with you the second half of her spanking!  Of course in her little cheerleading uniform she looks considerably more spankable.  From Punished Brats
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Ah the roaring 20’s a time when young women cast off the constraints of the Victorian era and became much to the chagrin of their elders and men alike Flappers.  Of course I am sure more than a few young ladies acting so scandalously by drinking and dancing {gasp} were dealt with by a good hard spanking.  Pandora Blake and Zille Defeu put on this historic recreation quite well this week on Dreams of Spanking
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It seems our famed Mr Masterson has taken another trip to the Tattoo parlor to find his next naughty girl.  Dear Reader meet 18 year old Harlan.  She is quite personable and rather perky.  While she was never spanked growing up she discovered early in her teen years that she is quite the submissive.  In fact I would say she enjoyed this spanking from Betty Blaze.  I do indeed look forward to more from her.  From Real Spanking or the better valued 8 site Real spanking Pass
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I never quite understood the English obsession with spanking with a slipper.  It just seems such a rather random object.  Certainly there are better implements to punish young ladies such as Your Humble Narrator’s namesake or various kitchen implements.  Why indeed a slipper?  Regardless it seems to be quite effective on this schoolgirls bare bottom.  From Firm Hand Spanking
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Finally for today we have a young lady enjoying the fruits of a sugar daddy.  But what indeed happens when she is patiently waiting for him and his wife shows up.  In this case she is in for a good hard spanking on her bared bottom.  From Handspanking
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Brushstrokes

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