A Day Late for the Weekend Spanking Roundup

I have been remiss Dear Reader in wishing my Jewish readers a Happy Chanukah! It is of course the 5th day of Chanukah so once again I am indeed late. Now it is a fine holiday in and of itself but the Jewish Religion is not exactly the most creative when it comes to celebrating so I wish to suggest a few “minor” changes.

You see we Christians have Christmas, the birth of our savior which logically we celebrate by cutting down a perfectly good tree and taking this now highly flammable thing into our homes and sticking it in the middle of the living room. We then cover it with cheaply manufactured lights from China and run electricity though it while giving equally cheaply manufactured crap from China to each other. I guess we can be thankful we don’t celebrate the holiday by standing in a puddle of gasoline and smoking a pack of cigarettes. in 4 months time we then celebrate Easter which of course is the celebration of the first documented zombie.

Our Jewish friends however are indeed not as creative. Since with the exception of Passover most of our Jewish friends holidays revolves around the celebration the senseless slaughter of their forefathers by whatever tribe found them bothersome at the time. Passover of course is the celebration of the senseless slaughter of the children of one of the tribes who thought to enslave the Jews instead of kill them!

So to give this holiday some pizzazz I suggest the following. The menorah is fine in my eyes, but the bulbs should be replaced by translucent rear end, preferably red. Instead of the Festival of Lights it indeed should be the Festival of spanking with at least 1 bare bottom spanking being given at least each day which should be picked by the spinning of the Dreidel. Then we can have Adam Sandler write another song about it.

But enough of my nonsense Dear Readers let us enjoy what some of the other bloggers and sites around the web had to say about spanking in the past week.

A Christmas Spanking