The Spanking Spot

Name: Aliza Shvarts

Age: 21 (I think)

Profession: Art Student, Yale University, "Performance Artist",  Nitwit,

Hometown: Los Angeles, Ca  (I think)

While I enjoy beautiful things Dear Reader,  Usually I tend to dislike the people who create them.  Its not that I hate Artists per se,  but more the silly holier then thou "I am a Artist" attitude that seems to pervade the art world.  I know this Dear Reader because some of my closest friends went to some pretty heavy duty art schools that in retrospect the over priced tuition would have better spent ripping up 40k and flushing it down the toilet for all it prepared them for life outside the "art" world.  Now while I make a generalization here there are some quite good art and artists around however our next guest on Women who desperately need a spanking is indeed not one of them. 

Probably the lowest form of "Artist" Dear reader is the "performance artist" which every time I hear can only think of the movie Suburbia, but I digress.  These special type of "Artists" Do not create anything.  They "perform" their "art" which usually is little more then ranting and raving about some nonsense in order to feel self important.  Now to further the stupidity is when you mix a "Performance Artist" and a "radical feminist". 

Now Ladies please don’t bombard Your Humble Narrator with hate mail.  It is not that I want to return to some stone age where the selection of a female was a whack over the head with a club and drag them away by their hair.  I am indeed a full supporter of Woman’s rights.  However the "Feminists" as they call themselves seem to simply hate being female.  Which I think you would agree is rather silly. 

Now you might not recognize the name Aliza Shvarts,  but I think you might have read about her in the news.  Ms Shvarts recently got her 15 minutes of fame by way of her Senior year "Art Project" at Yale University which (she claims) inseminating herself as often as possible then taking "herbal remedies" to induce a miscarriage.  This piece of "performance art" was meant as she says to "spark conversation and debate on the relationship between art and the human body".  Personally Dear Reader I think it is a relationship between a idiot and her dislike for not having a penis.  But don’t take that from me,  see what she wrote.

Just as it is a myth that women are .meant. to be feminine and men masculine, that penises and vaginas are .meant. for penetrative heterosexual sex (or that mouths, anuses, breasts, feet or leather, silicone, vinyl, rubber, or metal implements are not .meant. for sex at all), it is a myth that ovaries and a uterus are .meant. to birth a child. When considering my own bodily form, I recognize its potential as extending beyond its ability to participate in a normative function. While my organs are capable of engaging with the narrative of reproduction . the time-based linkage of discrete events from conception to birth . the realm of capability extends beyond the bounds of that specific narrative chain. These organs can do other things, can have other purposes, and it is the prerogative of every individual to acknowledge and explore this wide realm of capability.

These organs can do other things?  Perhaps she wishes her ovaries could drive.  Or her uterus to have a successful career as a chef.  I am sorry Dear Readers,  but when it comes to biological function things are more or less cut and dry.  Eyes function are to see.  ears to hear.  and various female sex organs,  well they make babies.  Plus they are pretty good at it.  Why try to force them into a function they dislike. 

Such nonsense could only be held by a "performance artist",  one that has yet to graduate.  Furthermore when espousing such nonsense it helps to be a over indulgent brat. You see our Abortion Aliza’s daddy not only footing the bill for a useless degree in Yale apparently also footed the bill for her very exclusive education at the Buckley School in Los Angeles which runs just a tad under $30,000 per year. 

Now as a followup Yale now claims the whole thing was a Hoax,  which I indeed hope is true due to the rather useless and offensive nature of her actions.  Now once again,  Ladies,  what you do with your body is your business.  And quite honestly I like annoying the Christian right just as much as the next guy.  but doing something like this for "Art" is just stupid

Offences: Stupidity, being annoying, hating a innocent uterus

Suggested Implement: Hand

Suggested Spanker: Any male

Suggested Position: OTK

Suggested Punishment: One Hour Bare bottom Spanking in front of Feminist Friends by a MAN!  (hey its performance art, were trying to spark debate on the relationship between a man’s hand smacking a bare ass)

Corrective Action: make up with uterus, graduate with useless degree, get pregnant, have baby. 

Brushstrokes

Names: (left to right)  
             Brittni Hardcastle (17)
             Cara Murphy (16)
             Kayla Hassell (15)
             April Cooper (14)
             Brittney Mays (17)
             Mercedes Nicols (16)

 
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Occupation: Students of Mulberry High school,  Cheerleaders, Trailer Trash,  6 on 1 ultimate fighting champs, guests of the Polk County Sheriff

Hometown: Lakeland, Florida

What ever happened to the good old fashion fist fight Dear Reader.  Two guys meet someplace after school after a disagreement,  and surrounded by friends and classmates cheering them on generally beat each other up until on "gives".  Rarely resulting in

more then a black eye, torn clothes and a few bruises and scratches.   More often then not our school yard gladiators shook hands and the disagreement was quickly forgotten only to become friends (or at least tolerate) one another once again. Of course in the days I describe fighting was generally relegated to boys but on the rare occasion we were treated to a spectacle of a girl fight. 

Now when I was growing up boys somehow simply knew we could hurt one another severely,  and unless one was a psychopath generally we wanted to refrain from that.  Girls on the other hand do not have a sense of ingrained restraint.  So on the rare occasion when they turned to violence most of the boys who were delighted by such a display simply let the hair pulling and the scratching go on for a brief period to allow for the dissipation of aggression and then pulled them apart before they could do any real damage to each other.  Times have changed Dear Reader,  Times have Changed. 

Before I go on,  if you have been a reader of this blog for any length of time I typically refrain from talking about spanking women under the age of 18.  But I figure if its good enough for the US Justice system treat these girls as adults then it is indeed good enough for The Spanking Spot to pass its judgement.

This has been a pretty big story world wide,  but just in case Dear Reader that you missed it.  It appears that our gaggle of trailer trash spawn,  lured a fellow cheerleader by the name of Victoria Lindsay to the home of Mercedes Nicols.  Our gangland wannabies then proceeded to lock her in the house and pummel her for 30 minutes while taping it for a You Tube Video.  thus engaging in a level of stupidity surprising even by Florida standards.  These girls were aided by two boys whom allegedly acted as lookouts.  And if Dear Reader I had Men who Desperately Need a Spanking feature would surely be included.  But for now we will leave the justice system to deal with them.

The "reason" for the attack is that Ms Lindsay was "trash talking" them on MySpace,  Which apparently is grounds for beating someone within a inch of their lives for our future ex-con unwed mothers.  For those of you who haven’t seen this attempt at cinematographic excellence I am including it here.  Just a warning,  while I enjoy a girl fight just as much as the next guy this is quite disturbing. 

Perhaps it is the sign of a much more violent society,  perhaps its just poor parenting or just really really dumb girls.  But the amazing thing Dear Reader our dimwitted girls apparent ignorance of how much trouble they are actually  in.  Charged with Felony  assault, Kidnapping and federal tampering of a witness these girls could face as much as life in prison in our moronic justice system.  One would think when faced with such a punishment they might be mildly concerned.  However as a testament to the stupidity of  these girls one wondered out loud to the arresting officer if she would make cheerleading practice the next day.  Furthermore the girls were observed during the arraignment laughing and joking that it would be unlikely that they make it to the beach this summer. 

The heinous nature of the crimes aside,  This incident one again demonstrates the need for public beatings as punishment for juvenile (and some adult) Crimes.  Putting 14-17 year olds in jail for the rest  of their lives particularly when they have never been in trouble before is simply idiotic.  Had something like this happened before our Youtube generation it would be likely these girls would be thrown off the cheerleading squad,  suspended, grounded and perhaps been administered a good bare bottom beating from one of their parents.  Free to get pregnant at 19 and live in a double-wide or perhaps in the unlikely event one or two of them smarten up make something of themselves.  Instead we choose to charge them as adults an more then likely incarcerate them with hardened  criminals ensuring that their lives are more or less ruined.  Stupidity Dear Reader in its finest. 

Brushstrokes

Name: Dana Marie Perino

DOB: May 9, 1972

Occupation: White house Press secretary, Disseminator of fallacy, hot republican, dunce

Hometown: Evanston, Wyoming

Back in the day, Dear Reader,  before the Republican party was taken over by the religious right wing.  Republican women were more or less represented by middle aged over indulged upper crust women who never worked a day in their lives.  Their political philosophy was limited to what their husbands told them and whichever party would encourage their husbands to make enough money to allow them to have the nicer luncheon at the tennis club with their other middle aged over indulged upper crust friends.   This of course changed during the Reagan Revolution when the religious right found their dominance and our lunching ladies were replaced by other middle aged ladies insisting that no one should have sex and that the earth was 6000 years old.  As time progressed and their brainwashed offspring grew up a new generation of Republican has come to dominance in our Bush Whitehouse.  The hot Christian feebleminded soccer mom!  

Now our illustrious idiot and chief was never one to surround himself with smarter people.  This of course is a problem since history has shown us that our MBA president isn’t exactly a rocket scientist, and although his father might have bought him into Yale,  at the very least he attended a accredited college.  During his reign king George has recruited his people from the ranks of barely accredited university and law schools around the country only to wonder why the rest of us thinks that he is an incompetent boob.  As I said dear Reader king George isn’t the smartest apple in the bunch. 

Our next guest on Women Who Desperately Need a Spanking is indeed one of these perky political players.  Dana Perino came to our attention nationally when she was appointed to succeed Tony Snow as the White House Press Secretary.  Now Dear Reader,  while Tony was well suited for this position, smart, articulate and more then used to lying for a living while with Fox news.  Dana,  seems to be none of these things but at least she is better to look at then Mr Snow. 

Originating from Evanston Wyoming,  A place I have never (and hope to never again) have heard of.  Unlike most of W’s stooges actually attended a semi-decent university. And while perhaps her knowledge of history, politics, science and economics may be a bit underdeveloped (things that might be useful for White House Press Secretary to know).  She showed a talent early on to be unbothered by fallacy and stand fast stating whatever moronic position her bosses took in the face of public opinion, science and facts.  Starting her career as a staffer for Rep Scott McInnis  who was eventually investigated by the FCC regarding paying his wife out of campaign funds and  funneling money to the defense fund for disgraced speaker of the house Tom Delay though his breast cancer charity. 

Why she needs a Spanking
In politics the truth (or lack there of) doesn’t seem to bother either Republican or Democrat so why indeed should our perky clueless soccer mom be held to a higher standard?  Well Dear Reader its not so much her disregard for the truth but rather the scope of her disregard for it.  We all tell little white lies of course but I honestly believe that this woman has never uttered a truthful statement other then stating her name in her life.  If of course I am wrong, this of course would lead one to believe an even worse suggestion.  She is really that dumb!  Either Dear Reader would make her well deserving of a spanking. 

Take for example her assertion that there may be benefits to global warming such as "reduced deaths due to hypothermia".  Now while I might think that this Global warming thing is a bit overblown and I am sure that there would probably be "some"  benefits (such as Florida being under water)  to such a disaster I highly doubt decreased incidents of people freezing to death would be one.  That begs the question Dear Reader,  will King George declare a war on cold?  Now before we put this incident off to the White House’s penchant for ridiculous argument another incident suggests otherwise.  Admitting that she had to ask her husband (an Englishman 18 years her senior) what the Bay of Pigs and the Cuban Missile Crisis were, one would be more then justified in being slightly suspicious that our country is being lead by a group of people who couldn’t get past the first round of "Who is Smarter then a Fifth Grader".  

Offences: Lying, Stupidity, Not having children and driving them to soccer in a huge SUV
Suggested Position: OTK (best for soccer moms)
Suggested Implement: Hairbrush
Suggested Spanker: Does it matter?
Suggested Punishment: 15 minute spanking on the bare ass after each press conference plus one per each false statement
Corrective Behavior:  Teach cold weather survival at Bob Jones University. 

Brushstrokes