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Olive Oil, Tornado’s and The Spanking of Brandi Timmons

You might recall Dear Reader that last year when a little storm named Sandy decided to take a trip to my beloved city thus drowning large parts of it.  The aid that we northerners generously give to our more disaster prone brothers and sister states was opposed by some of our conservative crazies.  Two of which hail from the great state of Oklahoma, which other than the fact it shares the name with a famous musical I doubt many Americans could locate it on a map.

Of course the liberal media who in no way shape or form represents real America loves hypocrisy.  Particularly since as of late it seems to ooze from our conservative crazies so it was unsurprising that they paid these two senator’s a visit to ask them about it since they have a habit of building trailer parks in front of places tornado’s like to go which indeed turned out badly the other day. 

Unsurprisingly our two OK yokels found the question offensive stating this is not the proper time to talk about opposition of disaster funds during such a tragedy and to have “some respect” for the people of their state while they morn because apparently Tornado’s are completely different than Hurricanes since the latter is caused by non existent global warming.  Sadly unsurprising from one of the idiots who felt the need to apologize to BP because people were generally outraged that they had let a whole lot of oil go in the ocean and had no way to shut it off. 

Well now that I have said my piece Dear Reader,  it is time to get on with the start of the Spanking Updates of the Week!

I got a happy note from my Dear Friend Greg the Mystery spanker this week.  It appears over the past week he located his next victim…ahem model.  Actually I am impressed with my friend Greg’s new hire for his lingerie line.  A 25 year old Bikini Model by the name of Ms Brandi Timmons.  Now the thing that this Georgia bell does knot know that such a tiny girl at 5’3” and a tight little bottom is a perfect specimen for a good old fashion OTK Spanking,  particularly when she acts up during a photo shoot.  Now Greg leaves the honors to his new Mystery spanking,  but while the cries of BAAAAAD Girl are not echoing though the Blue-ridge mountains his assistant is turning into a very capable spanker.  From Bun Beating Fun.
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You know Dear Reader whenever I happen across a hot girl like Kay Richards displaying obvious signs of advanced zombification wielding a rather large butcher’s knife.  My first instinct is of course to put them over my knee and spank their bare bottom.  Not that it will do much good of course since her imminent conversion to the undead tends not to leave much of a memory (other than brains).  But how could you possible turn up the opportunity!  From My Spanking Roommate or the better valued 5 site Clare Fonda Pass
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You know,  I never quite got how our friends in the old countries got hoodwinked into joining the EU.  Yea a common currency is kinda nice but one only need to look to the UN what unelected might be spending their time on.  Sure I think the UN’s obsession with “women’s rights” in Afghanistan is noble but before the women of that country start burning their bra’s and refuse spankings from their husband perhaps we should get them to stop blowing shit up first?  Thus is the situation with the EU, since their bumbling bureaucrats in Brussels have seen fit to ban olive oil from the fine restaurants that they are blessed with.  Instead of a simple jug of EVOO,  put on the table they must now provide pre-packaged single serve olive oil to “preserve the integrity of said product”.  Yes how classy,  pouring your EVOO from a ketchup packet.  Now one would think they have other things to worry about,  like the banking crisis or maybe Greece? Perhaps they should decree that Schoolgirl Kelly Wilson should recieve more spankings.  Oh wait,  our portly punisher has already seen to that.  From Sound Punishments.
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One of the amusing things about spanking is the look of complete surprise on a girls face when they realize their panties are getting pulled down.  I mean come on,  did you expect any less?  Its a spanking for Pete sakes.  Its supposed to be one the bare.  From Punished Brats
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Since I am writing this, As you might have guessed I am not the recipient of the 600MM Powerball.  For those outside of the great states of America,  like our Able Amsterdam Authoritarian. This is where those of us eligible slap down a few dollars for an infinitesimal chance at becoming ridiculously rich. Now when you think of it,  You are not actually getting 600 million.  First since its paid over 20 years and you definitely want to take it as a lump sum. The value is about half.  Add in taxes and you will probably net 200 Million which is still a fair sum unless you are a CEO.  Now if you invest it wisely you can get at least 5% which would be about 1 Million per month.  Of course thanks to our conservative crazies this is only taxed at 15% so, at least for Your Humble Narrator, is more money than I think I could ever spend.  I just don’t want that much stuff!  If it were me,  I would travel the world looking for woman who need and willing participants of a hard painful spanking.  Like this young lady here.  From Real Life Spanking
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Not giving a flying fuck what the world thinks about them.  The Japanese have come up with a Butt Robot named Shiri which quite helpfully means Butt in the Japanese language.  This consists of a disembodied bare bottom that will react  or tense up when it is pain.  Are spanked robots far away?  Well this girl certainly hopes so,  she can finally sit down.  From Handspanking
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