Spanking Blogs from Around the World

This wasn’t the most pleasant of weekends for me Dear Reader. You see Your Humble Narrator was awakened to the screams of a 5 year old protesting whatever toy her brother took away from her at 8am on Sunday morning. Now anyone with a 5 year old can attest they tend to protest quite loudly and it is indeed to be expected. But while your bleary eyed host tried to calm this screaming creature down there was an angry knock at my door!

Of course it was my old and rather angry downstairs neighbor quite offended that this child decided to throw a tantrum at such an ungodly hour. Despite my apologies he of course continued to rant and rave at which I informed him yes I do have children, yes they do make noise, they are also rather short, prone to wake up at inopportune hours and carry disease none of which I can do much about.

Well this apparently was not what my neighbor wanted to hear. Now meanwhile the now calm 5 year old became alarmed that my tantrum throwing neighbor was threatening her tantrum throwing prowess and decided to rebut his tantrum with one of her own.

A natural reaction to a grown man to a crying child is of course escalating the situation to the point where violence is threatened. Now the funny thing is your Humble Narrator is not a huge fan of violence. The only thing I enjoy striking is a pretty girls bottom. But being rather small growing up I was indeed a high priority target for those who did enjoy it. Now like all things fighting is a skill, and after being in enough of them I got considerably better at it which the odd thing is then you really have no use for it anymore. I think the last fight I got into was in the 80’s where I destroyed a hot water heater with an unfortunate drunks face for sucker punching my friend. But I digress

Finally after informing of him of my unique set of professional skills and any such escalation would result in him owing me large sums of money regardless if he “won” or not he indeed stormed away and I was indeed left with the task of calming down the 5 year old (again) who was considerably less concerned with my professional skills than my neighbor.

Now one would think that is where it ends. But a few minutes later another knock at the door came. It was my friendly neighborhood officer responding to a noise complaint, one of course generated by a 5 year old! Now perhaps I am indeed just odd Dear Reader but calling the police to report a noisy child is not typically an action I would entertain. For starters its not exactly something they could do anything about, and among other things I would feel rather funny calling the law over an unhappy 5 year old.

Well to end this entertaining story I let the officer go on with his officer like lecture since it is simply not worth the trouble to point out to a cop that anything he says is absolutely ridiculous and offered him some coffee at which point thankfully he went away.

I indeed cannot wait to find another secluded farm in my adopted New England where I can spank. Both unhappy children and Naughty girls are welcome to scream any time they come by. Now enough of this off topic rant let us see what our other bloggers have been doing this past week.

Is this what women do at sleepovers?