Name: Lisa Marie Nowak
Profession: Astronaut, Beta Tester for Adult Diapers
DOB: May 10, 1963
Hometown: Washington DC
Before I begin with our Crazy Cosmos Cruiser I must say that today I am sad. One of the most deserving celebrities for a good hard old fashion spanking is dead. Perhaps if Anna Nicole was put over someone's knee a couple of years ago we would not be mourning her death. While I was never a fan it is indeed sad. Godspeed Anna.
Of course if it wasn't for Miss Smith's untimely demise the media circus around out next guest on Woman Who Desperately need a spanking would still be in full swing. My friends meet Captain Lisa Nowak, Aerospace engineer, Astronaut, Wife and a mother of 3 and completely Batshit Crazy.
Interested in Space Flight from an early age Captain Nowak (then named Caputo) dedicated a good portion of her life to fulfilling her dream. Her education was impressive attending the US Naval Academy graduating with a B.S. in Aerospace Engineering and subsequently her Masters from US Naval Post Graduate program. Selected as a astronaut in 1996 after logging almost 1500 hours on 30 different aircraft she finally fulfilled her dream of Space Flight on July 4 2006 spending 13 days in space and performing 3 space walks.
Why she needs a spanking
Well, to any ladies that might be reading this. Imagine for a minute. Your Smart, very attractive for 43, Fit, Successful in your chosen career, you have joined an elite club of humans who have left the atmosphere of our beloved planet. You are the first Italian American to do so and you have a husband and 3 kids.
Of course your first instinct is to have play hide the salami with a fellow astronaut who has an unpronounceable last name and who's hair looks like they stapled a squashed roadkill to the top of his head After your husband finds out and Mr Roadkill dumps you for a gal who desperately needs to eat a sandwich. You of course decide to drive 20 hours from Texas to Florida wearing a Diaper to confront toothpick girl with rubber tubing, A BB gun, knife and assorted garbage bags. This just wreaks of self confidence!
Sometimes fact is stranger than fiction.
Offences: Way too many to list
Suggested Implement: Prison Whip
Suggested Position: Leia Ann Woods can Decide
Suggested Spanker: Colleen Shipman
Suggested Punishment: Incarceration for 3 years. 10 strokes of the whip each day
Corrective Action: Finish Incarnation, Tell us if you banged the guy in space. Make record books.